There is something I learned in all these years of dancing. Thanks to dancing. Something important about the kizomba connection. I also learned to hear myself, to be conscious of what I feel and how I feel.
People I accept
There are people whose energies my body does not accept. It never will. I stopped fighting myself to try to adjust to such people, to look for the way to get to them, to understand them. Now I just accept the fact that we are simply incompatible with me, like butter and water, and I feel better, because I realized that It’s not possible to have true good relationship with absolutely everybody, because I can’t go against my nature.
People I don’t accept
On the contrary, people I accept, I do it no matter what they say or do. We don’t need ages to get close. We already ARE close. I have also been observing how we are all connected to each other on the dance scene, who gets on well with whom, who makes friends with whom.. And I noticed some certain patterns: we get attracted by similar types of energy, as in a molecular world with positively and negatively charged ions. We get attracted or refused by smell.
The kizomba dance increased in a hundredfold my sensitivity and perception of people at some subcutaneous level. It’s like superpower, as the sensory abilities that we develop through constant physical contact with a huge number of people, as if in a few seconds I can read information from the energy field of people, which allows me to realize whether their ions match with mine or not.
In the ordinary world, we also feel and understand this, but in kizomba it is much more noticeable, and perception is much sharper. And I’ll tell you why.
During the dance we sweat. Each of us emits a certain natural smell of our body. With close physical contact, these smells at subconscious level give signals to the brain. This forms an unmistakable acceptance or rejection of one or another person. Pheromones that rule the ball will determine what we call a “kizomba connection”. In the ordinary world they do not attack us on the go. Some time passes before we allow physical contact, but on the dance floor we save ourselves this time. Therefore, in the first dance with a stranger, we sometimes get an offer to go to bed. This is not surprising.
To understand what pheromones are, you can remember about hormones. Hormones are chemicals that seem to bind the whole organism into one whole, providing a quick exchange of information between its parts. Pheromones play the same role. Only their task is to connect individuals belonging to the same species of animals to couples or communities. The “chemical” communication of humans involve some special substances.
Throughout the development of human communities, we do everything to suppress the instinctive reactions of people to smells, so that we could better control ourselves, control our animal instincts. In kizomba, it is very difficult to do so because of a close physical contact.
Although our sense of smell is weak when we compare it to the smell of many animals, the smell from our bodies is stronger than in animals. Many women find the smell of a man pleasant, if they are attracted to him, and unbearable if a man does not like them.
In addition to the pheromone cocktail, body smell carries a lot of other information, which also enhances or weakens the response to pheromones. For example, if we give a mice a wide range of partners for mating, it prefers those whose genotype was the most different from their own. It is possible that similar unconscious selectivity exists in humans: the limb system processes the information carried by the smell, and decides whether to open the path to passions.
Pheromones are honest signals. You can hide the true feelings by changing your facial expression. You can hide the true thoughts, uttering insincere words, but it’s very difficult to change the smells that spread our body. Sebaceous glands, sweat glands, glands of the genital organs work continuously, sending information about the state of our desires to the environment. Pheromones, awakening various behavioral (instinctive) and physiological reactions, manage the complex process of rapprochement.
This is the “molecular world” what I mentioned above. The dance scene is an excellent example of an instinctive animal world. In creativity we are closer to nature. We are natural in understanding and expressing ourselves. But our kizomba connection is determined. And we can do nothing about it. Go dance!!! This is a great way of self-discovery!
** Some information taken from https://www.nkj.ru/archive/articles/1243/